Swinger Parties General Knowledge

Going to a swingers party can be a fun and exciting experience. Parties hosted at a private home will be much different than the parties hosted by clubs. If you are wondering how things differ, and what to expect, you’ve hit the right place.

Know What To Bring

Most often the hosts will include information on the invitation that tells you what, if anything, you should bring with you. It’s a good idea to pack a small bag with toiletries and towels regardless of what the invitation says. You may be asked to bring your own alcohol if it’s a BYOB party.

What To Wear

Some parties will be casual, while others may have a theme. If there is a theme, you should always do your best to dress appropriately. This not only ensures fun, it shows respect to the hosts for the time and energy they put in to planning. For parties that don’t list a theme, or say casual on the invite, be sure to wear something classy and sexy, with the more risque stuff either packed with you or under your clothing.

What To Avoid

While the swingers parties can be a lot of fun, and everyone is open minded, there are several things that are considered faux pas in the swinging world. If a bedroom door is closed, keep it that way. The occupants want their privacy. Never watch unless you’ve been invited. The hosts may have no nudity zones, respect those. Always follow all the rules the guests have set up. They are there for a reason.

Swingers Party Etiquette

Going to a swingers party for the first time can be nerve-wracking. There are certain things that are known in the swinging community, but if you haven’t been part of it, you may not realize what all of the unwritten rules are. Here’s a simple guide to the expected etiquette.

RSVP - Swingers parties can be difficult to set up. In most cases only about 1/4 of the people invited are able to attend. With a swingers party, this can be frustrating. Be sure to let the guests know what your intentions are before you show up. This allows the host to plan accordingly.

Parking - Find out about appropriate parking before you go out. Many people don’t want their neighbors to know about a large party, and others may live in a neighborhood with little to no street parking. Most hosts will consider this and plan for parking.

Go Clean - This should go without saying. Take time to shower, shave, clip nails, and just follow overall good hygiene before you go. If you don’t, it will likely be the last party you are invited to.

Bring Your Own Items - While most hosts will provide towels and toiletries, it’s always a good idea to bring your own just in case. A small overnight bag stocked with robes, towels, soap, and other items is a good thing to have.

Drinking And Drugs - Not only are drugs illegal, they can affect your performance. A swingers party will be no fun if you are too inebriated to perform. Many parties will have alcohol to loosen the mood, but know beforehand what you can handle and don’t go over that threshold.

Advice For Your First Swingers Party

A swingers party can be intimidating the first time you attend one. House parties are set up differently than off premise clubs where no sexual activity is allowed. A house party is a much more open environment where couples are encouraged to participate in sex and have fun. There are rules and etiquette guidelines to follow. This combined with a more open environment can make the experience awkward for the first timers. Here are a few ways you can get through your first time jitters and have a great time.

Play the Games

Many swingers parties will include some fun and sexy games in the beginning of the evening. This is not only fun, it serves as a way to relax the crowd and get everyone warmed up. Even if you are nervous, go ahead and try to participate. You will find that the nerves start to wear down and you will become more comfortable.

Admit It’s Your First

Telling people it’s your first house party will help ease the tension. Many people will also find this sexy, and won’t mind taking you under their wing. This is a good way to get to know people at the event as well.

Understand the Rules

Spend a few minutes going over the rules. Each house party will have their own set of rules, and breaking these rules can get you thrown out and banned from future parties. If you don’t understand a rule, don’t hesitate to ask someone. The hosts or other guests will have no problem explaining them, they’d rather you ask then break a rule.

What To Wear At Swingers Parties

Swingers parties will be set up slightly differently than a swingers club. While most of the rules remain the same, your attire may need to be changed a little. Some parties will be more liberal with their dress code than others. Here’s what you should know.

Check the Invitation

Before you make any decisions regarding your attire, check the invitation. If there is a theme to the party, such as a costume party or a pool party, this will be specified on the invitation. If nothing is mentioned regarding attire, you could call the host to verify, or assume it will be standard club attire.

Be Respectful

Since many parties are hosted privately in someones home, you should think about their neighbors and privacy before you show up wearing nothing but chaps and a cowboy hat. Their neighbors don’t want to see this, and the hosts probably need to keep things discrete. You can dress in a sexy manner as long as you keep it classy as well. The best rule of thumb – if you wouldn’t wear it to a nice dinner party, don’t wear it to the swingers party.


While you should look respectable, you can wear skimpy, sexy lingerie under your clothing. Many people choose to bring an overnight bag with clothes to change in to once the party gets going. This is also great for those who wish to wear fetish-wear. Many party hosts will request you show up in ‘normal’ clothing and change inside for costume themed parties as well. This is always acceptable, and typically welcome.

How To Organize A Swingers Party

Setting up a swinging party isn’t difficult. It will require more than just sending out invitations though. If you are thinking of hosting your own party, here are a few tips to consider.

Clean Up

You want your whole home to be clean and ready for activities. If you own a hot tub or pool, plan to have it used. Have it cleaned the day of or the day before the party. Be sure all the bedrooms are ready with clean sheets and bedding as well. If you won’t allow smoking in your home be sure to set up a designated area outdoors to accommodate those guests. Having bowls with extra condoms around the house is also a good idea.

Food And Libations

You don’t need to plan a full meal, but having snacks and finger foods is a nice touch. Once the festivities get rolling, people will start looking for food to replenish spent energy. If you plan on having alcohol, have a bar area set up with ice and cups. Even if you have a BYOB party, a bar area that is stocked with mixers, ice, and straws is a good idea.

Plan Some Games

Games are a great way to break the tension at any party. These will allow people to relax and get to know each other before the real fun begins. Spin the bottle, strip twister, and I’ve never are all great ice-breakers.


The invitations will set the mood for the party, and give your guests important information. Include RSVP dates, detailed directions including parking instructions, whether toiletries such as towels will be provided, and if it’s BYOB.

Four Things To Make A Swingers Party Swing

Hosting a swingers party is a great way to build your reputation as a member of the swinging community. If the party is a hit, you are sure to have a high turn out at future parties. If it’s boring and awkward, you may struggle in the future trying to get people to RSVP to the parties. Here are 4 tips to help make the party a success.

Plan Games

Adult games are a great way to break the ice and loosen the mood. A great party host will have some games planned to help get everyone in the mood. Think of fun games that don’t really require a lot to put together or play. Naked twister, strip poker, spin the bottle, and the classic truth or dare are always popular choices.


Hosting a theme party is also great fun. People love dressing up, and a theme swinger party gives them an excuse to. If there aren’t any major holidays close by, consider making one up. Love pirates? Have a pirate theme party. Disco themes, character themes, and other more generic themes are great for times of the year when there are no holidays close.


A nice touch is for the host to provide toiletries and clean towels. Even if you told the guests to bring their own, having small bags with sample sized shampoos, soaps, and condoms will be a cheap way to make your guests feel more at ease. Also plan for smokers to attend, and have either a room designated or an outdoor area ready.


Every great swingers party will have snacks and finger foods for guests. This gives people something to occupy their time while they wait to get together, and can help replenish energy.

How To Find Swingers Parties In Your Town

Finding swingers parties isn’t as difficult as you may think. While the community is largely an underground phenomenon, it’s usually much larger than many people think. If you are looking for parties in your area, there are several places you can check out.

Local Swingers Clubs

Most local swingers clubs will have events throughout the year where swingers can meet up. Some of these clubs will host events on premises, meaning it’s open to sex. Others are held off premise, and these will be set up where no sex is allowed. The off premise events can still be fun, and a great way to meet other swingers who host private parties.

Swingers Websites

If you are more savvy online, you can find many websites devoted to swinging. Most of these sites will offer the ability to create profiles, and some even have chat rooms and forums where you can meet other people. These are great because you can browse discreetly from the privacy of your home. You can also spend time getting to know the other swingers before you decide to accept an invite to a private party.

Host A Party

Another great way to find other couples in your area that host parties is to host one yourself. If you know a few swingers, invite them and ask them if they know of other couples who may be interested. Hosting a party doesn’t take much effort or money, and can be a lot of fun. After the party be sure to have a way to stay in contact with the other couples who showed up. This way you can stay in the loop regarding future parties in your area.

Adult Party Games For Swinger Parties

Having games at swingers parties is a great way to break the ice and allow everyone to relax. There are some great sexy games you can play that will not only break the ice, but will get everyone in the mood for more action. Here are a couple games to consider.

I Never

I Never is a fun game that requires very little prep. Before this is played, you need to think of a ‘punishment’ as part of the game. Some people choose to take shots, but this can backfire if someone gets inebriated before the fun begins. For a swingers party, consider having clothing removed or sex toys used instead. Simply pick one person to start, and have that person make a statement. The statement should be something they have never done. For instance- “I’ve never had sex in a movie theater.” Those who have done this will be required to participate in the punishment.

Spin the Bottle

The old childhood standby can be tweaked slightly for a sexy adult game. Instead of kissing, you can make it a game of truth or dare, turn it in to a strip game, or even add in sexual favors depending on the mood of the crowd.

Strip Poker

Strip poker is a popular game for swingers. Just play which ever version of poker you like the best, only instead of betting those with the lowest hands must remove clothing. You can twist this by adding bets in place of stripping, but the bets become dares.

The simpler you keep the games, the better. You want to spice up the evening, not bore your guests.